5 years of...

"5 years of happiness, 5 years of tsunami (sometimes), 5 years of love, caring and sharing, and blessed with 2 little rascals..."

yes, it's our 5th wedding anniversary...5 years journey of life of 2 adults sharing and bonding their lives physically, psychologically and emotionally....sometimes it was a smoothe one, but there was always a turmoil in between...and i am very proud to experience and undergo the past 5 years with my other half, Dr Asrul...

this year, we did not plan anything in advance...dear hubby is currently in a stress situation preparing for his exam which is 1 week away...probably we'll go for a short break later when everything is settled...

i bought him something "special"...he needs a new one as his old one will be needing a CPR soon...i hope he doesn't know what i'm buying for him...it's an anniversary and a birthday gift as well..his birthday is coming soon too... NO, I'M NOT TELLING YOU GUYS YET WHAT I'M BUYING FOR HIM...he hasn't received it from me... will let you guys know later...

i pray for this marriage to last forever and insya Allah be blessed with more kids after this..(perhaps another 2 or 3 more)....

Happy Labour Day to all...

S.A.H.M (stay at home mom)

why do i want to be a S.A.H.M...?

• i want to spend the whole day with my kids


• i'm currently breastfeeding, it is easier to directly breastfeed Imtiaz


• i can always cook for the family (currently i only cook when they want a special menu from me or when i have the time)


• i can manage my own family to my likings


• i can teach my kids a little extra from what they learn at school


• i can become my kids' own driver


• i don't have to crush and squeeze my head to deal with difficult patients who are just non compliance to medications


• i can exercise 7 days a week (now i'm doing it at 3-5 times a week)


• i can indulge in doing everything i love (shopping + window shopping, reading novels/magazines/newspaper, watching TV/movie, baking/cooking)


• i can be my own family's doctor


• i can surf the internet 24/7 (minus the time that needed to attend my kids) finding informations at the tips of my fingers


• i can blog and read other blogs to exchange views and opinions

why i can't be S.A.H.M?

• i have to complete my Master


• i'm bonded 7 years after completing my Master


• i won't have my own pocket money and i can't find ways how to find alternative income to stabilize the family's finances (i'm not a good entrepeneur)


• i tend to munch a lot in between meals, that will make me to balloon up

what i wish to be...?

• i want to complete my Master


• then want to become a lactation specialist


• complete my 7 years contract with my employer


• then i want to promote breastfeeding to the nation and work as a lactation specialist at my own time


• i want to have a flexible working hour so that i can manage my family as well


• i want to coach my kids myself

sometimes, you can't have what you want...make do with what you can...but there's always room to improve your life to the next stage...

Imtiaz's Breastmilk Factory

i love having the experience of being pregnant, then giving birth, then breastfeeding, nurturing and taking care of my own offsprings...these experiences differ from one child to another...and i learnt from the previous experiences to handle similar situations in the future...

being Imtiaz's Breastmilk Factory from his day 1 of life was not an easy experience....i had a painful experience to breastfeed him for the first 2-3 weeks...i had similar problems with Jihan as well...at that time i didn't quite sure how to make sure proper lactching to the breast...

with Imtiaz, i invested on buying a comfy, practical nursing pillow, My Brest Friend..it was expensive but i got a 15% discount at Robinson's during Year End Sale...it helped in proper latching, ease my back pain and holding Imtiaz comfortably...but the problem was, although Imtiaz did latch on properly, he had a strong and hard sucking action...that made my nipples sore and cracked!!

the first few days i still feel that the pain was bearable...it was like being stung when he first sucked then after a while when the sucking action regulated, the pain subsided....however, the pain on my right nipple was getting worst...i had to keep on pumping the right breast and not letting Imtiaz to nurse on that breast for a week so that the cracked and sore nipple will heal...i did try on Madela Purelan; it helped a bit, and i tried on Medela nipple shield but Imtiaz didn't like it....so, i left me with no choice...i kept on praying that it would heal fast so that i can nurse Imtiaz on both side of the breasts...

on the 3rd week, i had engorge and blocked duct of the right breast...it was an acute mastitis...i had to undergo a painful massage for over an hour to relieve the blocked duct and to ensure proper breastmilk flow...

i also had breastmilk abundance and i am very grateful with that, alhamdulillah...but what can i do with it..? it was just too much....i had to empty my breast both sides after feeding Imtiaz, if not it would become too engorge and painful....i didn't want to stock up frozen breastmilk too early, it would fill my entire freezer...so, my masseur told me to water the plants with the excess breastmilk and not to throw away the milk into the drain...insya Allah, the breastmilk supply will continue and the plants will grow taller....

and now, i've been Imtiaz's Breastmilk Factory for almost 2 months and i enjoy being one...i hope to continue nurse him until he is 2 years of age...i have started storing frozen breastmilk for him and continue making refrigerated stocks as well...he is currently 5.2kg (he was just 2.96kg at birth) and people always said he is big for a 2 month old...

the labour

On 5th march, I had vaginal bleed upon waking up from sleep in the morning….aha! it’s almost time….but I couldn’t feel any contraction and the bleed just stop…so, I decided to go the hospital just to check my status and my baby’s status….As my husband had a course to attend, my parents drove me to the hospital….we reached there at around 10 am and luckily not many patients were there….i had my cardiotocograph (CTG) done to check on my baby’s well being….i still can’t feel any contraction, just a minor back pain…the CTG was reactive….and vaginal examination (VE ) done showed that my os was sill closed…..so I was sent home, waiting for regular contraction….if not I would be admitted the next day for the induction of labour anyway…..

At home, the vaginal bleed was only minimal, regular contraction has not set in yet…I had a good lunch and dinner that day….i slept early that night but woke up at around 1 am due to regular contraction of 1:5…it continued until I cannot stand it anymore….at around 4 am, I woke hubby up, feeling that the contraction was more regular at 3:10….

we got ready and drove to the hospital at around 5 am….had my CTG done and it was reactive…VE done and I was already 4cm dilated!!! It was quite similar to my first delivery experience 3 ½ years ago….artificial ruptured of membrane (ARM) done and the liquor was clear….i was sent up to the labour room at around 6.30am….The labour room was empty at that time…I was placed in LR 4, the same room where I delivered Jihan 3 ½ years ago….the midwife gave me ravin enema which made me poo-poo…

at that time, the contraction was already very strong and regular 4:10….i asked them to ring the anaesthetist for epidural….probably I have to bear the pain until 8am before the next shift doctor took over from the oncall doctor…in the meanwhile I was given enthonox, a mixture of oxygen and nitrus oxide for the pain relief but it made me dizzy..at that time, whenever I felt the contraction, hubby had to rub my back to ease the pain…and hubby who was supposed to have a mock exam, had to excuse himself from attending the exam…..

alhamdulillah, at around 7.30am, Prof Joanna came to give me the epidural…it was such a relief…I couldn’t feel the contraction at all….I was able to have a good rest for about 1 hour and 15 minutes before the sensation to bear down was felt at around 9am…

I was supposed to be reviewed at around 10 am, so I thought I could wait until then…but the sensation became greater and I felt like pushing…I knew that I was fully dilated by then….i told hubby to call the midwife and asked them to check my os….and true enough I was fully dilated…the contraction was unbearable, at that time was 6:10….i held myself from pushing while waiting for my obstetrician, Prof Jamil to come…

i started pushing at around 9.40am with all my heart…..i found it a bit difficult to push efficiently …the contraction was strong and frequent but short, and I was out of breath…maybe because I’m getting older (hahahah..)..i felt that I’ve been pushing for ages, but Prof and the midwives were cool and encouraged me to push hard….at one point, I really felt the head was halfway out of the perineum and it just stuck there…and I gave my best for the last push and the head was out…I was so relieved, alhamdulillah….then the body was out, and a loud cry was heard, time of birth 9.58am and it was a boy!….hubby was preparing to take my baby’s first photo but Prof asked him to wear gloves to cut the baby’s cord…! Although he had cut many cord before, cutting his on son’s cord was a memorable one….

he looked tiny compared to Jihan but the look was similar….i gave him my first kiss before he was taken to be weighed and cleaned…in the meanwhile, I was in the 3rd stage of labour, awaiting the placenta to be expelled….i had a 2nd degree tear and a few stitches need to be made….my baby weighed 2.96kg, a little bit smaller compared to his sister 3.18kg….but both of them were born on Friday and I was glad that both my labours were easy and I didn’t have to endure long hours of pain and fatigue…

I straight away gave my baby my breast for him to get the goodness of colostrum…we were brought up to the ward later, the same ward when I was warded with Jihan but a different room, Baldu 1…..

I roomed-in with my baby so that I can exclusively breastfeed him, which I gave every 2 hours….the boy sucked very hard to get the colostrum out….Jihan came with my parents at noon and she was happy to see her little brother was already out of my tummy and mama was no longer fat anymore…!!!We were both well and discharged the following day…..we decided to name him Ahmad Imtiaz Iman bin Asrul …a new journey has just begun for our little Imtiaz….

Jihan's first day at school....

well, i'm supposed to put this on longgggg time ago...!!! we decided to sent Jihan to preschool this year...for her to make friends and mix around with others and to learn something...we chose to sent her over to Tadika Seri Khalifah in Bandar Seri Putra which implements the Little Caliph Program...

i took 4 days leave to sent Jihan to school, just to make sure she didn't feel scared and awkward seeing so many children in one place....she woke up at 7 and got ready for her first day of school...she looked very cute in her school uniform and her hijab...at the registration, many parents and children ahd already arrived...soon we heard crying voices....i left Jihan in the classroom and stood outside...she looked very timid, not warmed up yet to make new friends....after some time, i heard a familiar cry and Jihan was running towards the door with her watery eyes and nose....i comforted her as she was scared for not seeing me outside the window...it was so heart wrenching seeing your child crying inconsolaby...but then i managed to get her back inside and later i left her under the care of her teachers..

when i picked her up at 11am, she still looked sorrow...she told me she cried a bit after i left...but she was happy when she got a lot of stickers from her teachers....

the sobbing episode occured for a few days, especially when she saw other kids were crying...but overall she adapted to her preschool life and started enjoying herself at the school....

and now, she is a teacher at home teaching us what she had learned in school...

the pain of confinement

Confinement is the most miserable time for me….well, not always…it’s also time for me to pamper myself and to relax…but I missed the food and drinks that cannot be taken during confinement period….

My second delivery pain was a lot more tolerable than the first one…my haemorrhoid was not that bad as the first time….and I did not suffer from bad constipation….the wound healing was a lot faster than the episiotomy…

I breastfed Imtiaz exclusively…the mature milk appeared after 3 days and the flow was good and I produced a lot of breastmilk after I had a good massage to encourage the flow by Cik Ton…I had my urut and bertungku session for 4 days…it was a good one….i felt my body was a lot better after the massage…

After coming back from the hospital, my weight was 55kg…I lost 4 kg during the delivery….i usually took bread and milo for breakfast, sandwiches, biscuits or meehon for lunch and later rice with confinement delicacies for dinner….within 1 week I dropped another 2 kg….this is also due to exclusively breastfeeding of every 2 hours….i feel good about my weight and can’t wait to get back into shape after the confinement….my exercise apparatus and vcd were nicely stored for the past 9 months!!!!

I have my mum and hubby to help me out with the new baby and Jihan….it is not easy to handle 2 children at the same time…..i hardly can find time for myself to read up the novels that I bought earlier to read during confinement time….i usually rest and take my nap when Imtiaz is sleeping….Imtiaz takes a long time to breastfeed, sometimes up to 1/2 hour and sometimes twice or three times in 2 hours!! …it was quite tiring for me too...but he is relatively easy to take care of…

I produced a lot of breast milk this time….even after nursing Imtiaz, I was still able to pump out from the same breast about 2oz and the other breast about 4-5 oz….i had sore and cracked nipple too as Imtiaz likes to bite and pull my nipple when he was feeding…at one time, I had to express one side of the breast due to a very sore nipple and feed Imtiaz with only one breast….then I had blocked milk duct which required me to go back to Cik Ton for massage and heat therapy to relieve the blocked duct….it was a very painful experience….i had a mild mastitis then but luckily it didn’t turn out to become a breast abscess…

I can’t wait for myself to heal and get better and can’t wait for this confinement period to end….Imtiaz is getting heavier each day…his cheeks plumped up and he is more playful now…

Introducing....Ahmad Imtiaz Iman...

was born on 6th March 2009, 9.58 am, weighed 2.98kg at UKM Specialist Centre.....click here to read about my labour experience...!

updates..

It has been a while since I last blogged my stories and opinions…I’m still alive and in good health as always…and I’m still waiting for my 2nd child to be born…I have loads to blog about but I was too lazy and busy to write on it…and furthermore, now I have no more streamyx connection at home….I have moved to a new house, a bigger one but a bit farther from my workplace….but for the sake of my child’s education (oh, Jihan has started pre school…will write about it later), we decided to move to this new place, together with my parents as well…and this new area (especially my section) has no streamyx connection, they have not upgraded the system…. I am totally handicapped being wireless….celcom broadband also does not cover the area, even though this is a booming area in between Bangi and Bandar Baru Nilai….

I’m trying to update this blog (and my other blogs as well)…some of the important milestones of our family….

Tasik Kenyir Breakaway

We decided to take a short break, this time to Tasik Kenyir Resort and Spa… unfortunately, it was in the rainy season…we hardly saw Mr Sunshine….we had a dip in the swimming pool once, touring the town of Kuala Terengganu but did not managed to stop by at the places of interest, and on the last day of our stay, we got to go on a boat ride around Tasik Kenyir even though it was pouring….

It was a nice place…we hope to go there again when it is sunny…lots of outdoor activities can be done…

A few pictures here…pictures tell a thousand words…enjoy!

a successful training...

i've been longing to write about Jihan's recent achievement....it has been almost 3 weeks that she has successfully wee-wee in the toilet and 1 week of successfully poo-poo in the toilet...!!!

it happened out of sudden...we had trouble to get her to pee in the toilet as she kept holding her urine in the bladder...she would do that from morning till late afternoon until we put her back on diapers, then she would pee (a lot!!!) in her diapers....i wasn't that good at being so patient...she said that she wanted to pee, when i brought her to the toilet nothing came out...every few minutes she would drag me to the toilet but she came out dry....so 1 evening, i was peeing in the toilet bowl and she squatted on the floor in the toilet, and there it was her first pee without having me to scold and force her to pee....yeay!!! and now she would pee on her lovely toilet seata dn she just loves flushing the toilet....



and since then, she was dry by day and surprisingly by night as well, and there was never any accident before....and when we go out, she will pee at the public toilet, provided it is clean and non foul smelling...



but then i had another serious problem with Jihan....she was having constipation as she tend to hold her bowel content...i asked her to just poo-poo in her diapers but she was reluctant and kept telling us that it will leak to her legs...she ahd only 2 bowel movements per week insted of her normal habit of everyday and that was really worrying....her stool was quite hard and she only passed out a little....



then one day, she just decided to poo in the toilet and it was a success...the next day, she poo-poo 5 times in the toilet and since then she poo-poos daily in the toilet...



and now she keeps telling people that she is already a big girl as she is now fully utilize the toilet very well....and she got herself a Barbie tri scooter with a Barbie helmet for her excellent achievement....



P/S: she never use her expensive potty that we bought last year for the training....maybe i should keep that for my next baby....

BPA-free feeding bottles

i heard about BPA-free feeding bottles for quite some time but i did not take any action towards it...it's not that i was ignorant but i was quite usy to read thoroughly about it until recently....

you can just type the word BPA at any search engine and you'll be surprise at how much articles and beneficial informations you get from them and you would want to turn 360 degrees....BPA causes more harms than good...!

to my surprise my Jihan had been using a non BPA-free bottles since she was born!!!! after making some research, i decided to throw away the old bottles and change to a new brand...the older brand, AV*&T has not marketed the non BPA bottles widely in Malaysia yet, so it is quite difficult to find one...so, i resorted to MAM....i brought Jihan to to Mothercare and she chose the pink bottles....

Jihan seems to like the bottles without any fuss...it wasn't difficult for her to change from the old one to the new brand....

i'm waiting for the Year End Sale (YES) to buy a few bottles of similar brand for my newborn later...

salam Aidilfitri

i have not been updating this blog for quite some time...i wasn't feeling very well and i was preoccupied with other things as well..even, the other blogs were not up-to -date as well....i'll try my best to update them as soon as possible ( when i'm feeling ok and when the ideas are pouring..)

alhamdulillah, i'm able to fast the whole Ramadhan during this pregnancy (insya Alllah, 3 more days left..)...i was able to do so when i was pregnant with Jihan 3 years ago...but i was quite sad and i regretted myself for not be able to do the terawikh prayer...i was very, very tired after the breaking of fast and would usually put my feet up to rest...

despite that i was able to fast the whole Ramadhan, i wasn't feeling that good though, especially in the morning after sahur...i felt nauseated and sometimes vomited and my stomach got this hurricane going on inside...i felt better towards noon...

this Aidilfitri, i haven't make any cookies yet..probably won't be doing it though...might make some cupcakes, but that depends...me and hubby didn't tailor-made our baju kurung and baju melayu, so we bought the ready made ones...(i was scared that i won't be able to fit into them because i'll be 17 weeks pregnant during the Aidilfitri)....but somehow, i 'm still able to fit into my kebaya this Aidilfitri...yeah!!...i lose some weight this Ramadhan, my latest weight the last antenatal check up was 52.3kg...

anyhow, i'm taking this opprtunity to wish my readers a very prosperous and joyous Aidilfitri and maaf zahir batin....may Allah bless us this Eid...

take care and drive carefully....

award form kak neeza

thanks kak neeza for the award....so sweet of you...muah!

i'm 28 years old

i have not been updating this blog for a month!!!! yeah, i was quite busy and i'm not in good health as well...

i turned 28 last month, on July 5th...hubby gave me a bautiful watch and Jihan gave me a matching new wallet....and they treated me for lunch at Bubba Gump....

i have been living for the past 28 years and now i'm married to a wonderful hubby and blessed with a precious gem, Jihan....i have accomplished a few numbers of personal achievements that i am very proud of and those cannot happen without the support of my beloved parents, hubby and family....

i love my life now...furthermore, we are very excited and happy with an unexpected news that we received a few days after my 28th birthday....



i'm due in March next year...i pray and hope that this pregnancy is a smooth one....i created a new blog regarding this pregnancy, The Miracle of Life...

Jihan's first neb...

Jihan had quite a bad URTI recently and when i came home from work one day, i found out she was a bit tachypneic and her cough was very chesty...according to my maid she had audible wheeze as well...but she didn't give any medications to Jihan or called me to infrom on Jihan's condition...

Jihan was very uncomfortable with her condition and she cried whenever she coughed....there were bilateral rhonchi and she appeared very tachypneic...we decided to bring her to the A&E for a neb after the medication we gave did not improved her condition...

Jihan was rather scared at first to get her first neb but the she seemed to cool down and felt comfortable with it....soon after completing the neb, i auscultated her lungs and the rhonchi had disappeared and she was no more tachypneic...in fact, she was singing and dancing in the A&E...

that was her first episode of acute wheezing....hopefully, it was just a hyperactive airway...and now she is back to her square one- active, cheeky and mischivious...!